1. “Do you seriously want me to bury you in paperwork?” -AH

2. In response to an Assistant Superintendent asking, if I felt intimidated by the 30 people the district brought to Mike’s IEP meeting to intimidate me.

“Not at all, I’m only intimidated when I’m impressed!” -AH

3 “Our tax dollars hard at work.” -AH

4. “You’ve never met my son, how do you know that he would benefit from group speech?” -AH

5. “You’ve convinced me! He cannot hold a crayon but I think he will love participating in your violin class. I look forward to the public performance.” -AH

6. “I’m sorry, but violin class is part of his IEP, which is a legal document. If you would like to change your recommendation, you need to call for another IEP meeting. Until then, since you are legally obligated, I expect you to implement the IEP.” -AH

7. “You’re a government employee. I’m a taxpayer – you work for ME.” -AH

8. “According to YOUR website – that’s the law.”-AH

9. “Before we proceed, I’m going to need that in writing.” -AH

10. “According to your data sheets, among other things, Mike knew the phonetic sound to the letter M on November 3rd. Is that correct?” –AH

“Yes” – The Districts CBA – the man has a PHD

“Your name is on the data sheets. Are you the person who worked with him?” -AH

“Yes.” – CBA, PHD

“Before you falsify legal documents to present at an IEP meeting, you really should check the attendance records. November 3rd is Mike’s birthday – he was not at school. I guess we all agree upon the Independent Assessments at District expense now!” – AH

11. “… and you’re a Certified Behavior Analyst?” -AH

12. “How do you become the Superintendent of the 10th largest school district with a degree in agriculture?” -AH

13. “You do realize that the kitchen is in the classroom for a reason. Under the Freedom of Information Law, I would like a copy of the school budget for the Culinary Program and the ESE life skills cooking program. Something tells me that the typical students are cooking with actual food.” -AH

14. “I’ll be here EVERY day!” -AH

15. “I’ll be here until you do your job.” -AH

16. “How do you know he can walk up and down stairs alternating feet?” – AH

“I watched him entering the building.” – OT

“He arrived in a stroller – I guess we all agree upon the independent assessments at district expense now.”-AH

17. “As a professional, I bet you’re embarrassed by your recommendations.” -AH

18. At the end of an IEP meeting: “I’d like to call another IEP meeting.” -AH

19. “Do you mind moving, I’d prefer to sit at the head of the table so I can see everyone’s happy faces.” -AH

20. “Before we get started, I’m going to pass around a piece of paper. Please provide me your name, title, supervisor’s name, phone number, email address, and the number of times you have observed and/or interacted with my son.” -AH

21. “This is a Title 1 school, you’re receiving additional funding to lower your class sizes. If your Kindergarten class is going to have close to 30 students in it, someone is misappropriating funds.” – AH (Later found out she was my new neighbor.)


BONUS: Ten years after leaving the public school system, the Director

of Special Education whom I dealt with retired.

I sent her a retirement card…




  1. Katie Allen says:

    My distict is just as bad. One school is scared of me. The daughter with medical issues . The other school is relentless. I can’t wait for this year! Lol

  2. Ilze Lapsa says:

    Sounds like great sport. Is it getting your kid the help he needs? I know the powerful adrenaline charge of besting an idiot, but sometimes getting help also requires some goodwill. How do you find a balance?

    • ABSOLUTELY!! I’ve NEVER ‘bested’ anyone who didn’t deserve it. With the exception of one teacher, who Mike had for a couple of months while I fought to get him transferred, I’ve had COMPLETE support from his teachers and therapists.

  3. My friend just posted a link to this. Oh, where was this the last 3 years…on the other hand, I do have enough paperwork now to bury people. For the ASSistant principal who told me if only I made my daughter work harder and practice more, she’d “get it”…

  4. Love the way you kick butt. Wish I could have accessed a blog like this when my son was in school and we struggled with IEP meetings. My son, now 26, is permanently scarred by his school experience. Though he functions very well in the world considering he is neuro-atypical, he is still emotionally about 8-10 years old. It is a life long path of yearning for peaceful integration.

  5. Ann Honeycutt says:

    I love the list! I would love for you to be here in TN and be my child’s advocate:) Do school officials have a manual of things to say in IEP? Another famous one I have heard for years, we want Thomas to aim his urine more in the toilet! 🙂 You inspire me to fight harder… thank You for being You

  6. Oh my gosh! I thought you had been in my little people’s IEP meetings!! I was all – “Wait! What?!?! I’ve said that…and that…OH MY GOSH and that!” Thank you bunches for sharing! Love this and look forward to reading more of your posts. 🙂

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